Complacency

July 2, 2013

Yesterday was one of those roller coaster days. I was working and the kids were being fairly better than normal and i was able to squeeze in time to read 5 chapters from 1 Nephi before 10 am! (thats pretty good) I had a list of things to accomplish while the boys were napping that afternoon and i was motivated to get them all done and crossed off the list. Well i got 1 of the 3 things on my list checked off and began to work on the other 2. Part of that included checking on my passport status as well as becoming a resident of Nebraska. I was going through my wallet and discovered that my driver license expired on April 7, 2013. Needless to say i have been driving with out a license for nearly 3 months and had no idea. 

So i called the Nebraska DMV and was told that because it was expired i would have to take not only a written test but a driving test as well in order to get a NE license. My first reaction was not very good. I hate taking tests and i usually don't do well with them. So i started trying to figure out if there was a way i could just renew my license through Utah on line then take it in and have them switch it over to NE without needing to take any tests. The more and more i thought about it and tried to figure it out the more and more i realized there was no hope in being able to renew my license through Utah without being there in person, which meant that i would now have to study for 2 tests as well as pay double the amount had it not been expired. 

For some reason my emotions were on the fritts about it and it was a very long and emotional couple of hours as i let this whole situation settle in. As i was sitting at the table crying about all of this my mind opened up to thoughts about the Spirit World, where everyone goes after death and before the Resurrection. My situation matched that of trying to repent in the spirit world versus being on the earth. It is taught that although it is still possible to repent and change in the spirit world, it is much more difficult. In my situation Utah was this earth life (where i was when i could have easily renewed my license, for half the price), Nebraska was the spirit world (where i am now and its much more difficult to get a license at all), and my license was my temple recommend (or things that i didn't keep on top of while on the earth that are necessary for me to gain exaltation).

I have always had a testimony and an understanding of why it is so important to not procrastinate and to not get complacent or allow myself to get sucked in to committing sins of omission; however it wasn't till today that the reality of it all sunk in deep. I believe that the reason it was so emotional for me is because i was learning and receiving a much more sure testimony of this doctrine. Its almost like God allowed me to taste some of the pain that people feel who are trying so hard to change and repent but can't do it without someone being baptized for them and doing the rest of their work. I got a taste of the longing they must feel waiting and waiting and waiting for their relatives (who are still on this earth) to find them and do their work. And i will say it really hurt, in a way that i hadn't felt in such severity before. 

Now all this brings me to the title of this blog post, "Complacency." I know for a fact that this is the trap i find myself in more than any other temptation thrown at me. Prophets and Apostles tell us often that this is something all saints need to be aware of and watch closely. becoming complacent about a few of those things can really distance one from the Spirit. And just as my being complacent about renewing my license brought about a lot of stress and difficulty yesterday, complacency about those daily acts of reading the scriptures and praying will cause a lot of stress and difficulty not only in the spirit world but even in a week or a day from now. 

After my experiences yesterday i am now even more so committed to staying "up to date" with my relationship with the scriptures and with my Heavenly Father through prayer. And i encourage all my readers and followers to do the same.