The Answer to All the Hard Questions

Being in the Marriage and Family Therapy program has so many wonderful benefits.  I am able to learn so many valuable things that will help me to be a better mother, spouse, and friend.  I have enjoyed the difficult classes (as much as can be expected) and have LOVED all the rest!  One class that is required to take for the degree is Systemic Sex Therapy.  This has been a very insightful course to take and I have learned so much.  Along with the "normal" sexual dysfunctions discussed comes the lectures and discussions about the LGBTQ population.  The class takes a very liberal approach in discussing this topic which I have come to appreciate in the sense that yes these people are children of God as well and they deserve respect.  Yet i found myself being pulled in 2 different directions.  I firmly understand that in order to live in good standing in the church i cannot affiliate or agree with practices not approved by the church, but i also feel a deep love for this population in understanding that they didn't choose to have these struggles during their earthly existence and i want to be able to help them in their endeavors.  

This has been a real struggle for me to figure out where i fit in, wanting to help this population but knowing that it would jeopardize my standing in the church, but more importantly it would jeopardize my worthiness to attend the temple, take the sacrament, and ultimately my worthiness to be with my family for eternity.  

During one of the power point presentations done by a group of students in my class i had a major realization.  One of the students made the comment that "it is really sad that a person would be completely rejected because of their sexual status."  My first thought was agreed, but as i thought about it for a second i realized that NO!!! it is not sad... the world is changing and society is bending the morals that were set by God.  God's standard has NOT changed, it is man's standard that has.  So for a church to reject their own for choosing to act on their feelings is not something to be discouraged, it should be welcomed because it shows that the believers are faithful enough to stand behind the moral code that God set and to not be swayed by the changes in society. 

Another question that was asked during this presentation was "what are some of the first steps in order to help the US become a more LGBTQ approved society?"  My (silent) reaction was HECK NO!!!  That is not something we want to happen in this country... The Book of Mormon has a promise recorded for the inhabitants of this land (America), as long as the majority of the inhabitants are righteous then the nation will be blessed, once that isn't the case then the protection will be removed as well.  Thus working towards an LGBTQ society is asking for trouble.

One last thing that i didn't quite understand about the treatment for working with the LGBTQ population is that instead of treating to get rid of the symptoms, the therapist's job is to encourage the client to explore that part of themselves as a means to help them come to terms with and accept that they are Gay or Trans, etc.  So as a therapist working with this population i would be encouraging them to do the very thing that is against the morals set by God! 

So, just the other day as i was thinking more about this question as to where i fit in with my line of work, my understanding that these people still need help, and the morals set by the church.  I picked up the December 2014 Ensign to read while i was exercising and came across an article entitled: "The Answer to all the Hard Questions."  Reading this article brought so much clarity to my mind as to what i needed to do.  The article reminded me that "for my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the Lord." (Isaiah 55:8)  But there was one question that the article posed that hit the nail right on the head for me... 

"DO I TRUST GOD ABOVE EVERYONE ELSE?" 

This question helped me to realize that despite the judgments of my cohort, and the way i may look to others in the community as "the therapist who won't work with gays," i will know that what i have decided to do will be in good standing with the church but more importantly with God.  As i said before, he has set a standard for a reason, and it is wrong to think that he would change his ways because of man's justifications on what is appropriate.  I have come to the understanding that what i will do as a clinician needs to bring people closer to a state where they would be willing to accept the gospel of Jesus Christ.  I firmly believe that the "good news" can heal all wounds mental, emotional, and physical.  It is my job to help individuals get to a point where they are healthy in other areas of their lives so as to be ready to receive it when it is offered.  

All in all, this past semester has been very introspective for me.  It gave me the opportunity to really soul search and discover who i really am, what i believe, and how i can use my talents and abilities to spread the good news to the world!